When we are triggered, our limbic system (the reptilian brain) is activated and we find ourselves thrown into a 'fight, flight or freeze' response. Simultaneously we lose access to our pre-frontal cortex so our ability to think logically, speak calmly and make decisions for the common good (ie. all parties in the relationship) is diminished. When the limbic brain is in a state of high-arousal, the only message it transmits is 'defend or die'. Self-preservation is the limbic brain's only goal. This comes at a cost to our relationships because when we are constantly defending ourselves, we are making the other person wrong. It makes sense then that being triggered can be corrosive on relationships.
Neurofeedback therapy trains the central nervous system to relax so that our habitual reactivity becomes less and less intense — until one day we may even notice that things that used to trigger us, no longer do so at all. The neurofeedback process is effortless: lie back and relax and enjoy the music while the feedback teaches the brain to become calm. And for those who hate dredging up painful past events, you don't even have to talk about your problems because the healing happens beneath the conscious mind.
Training the brain with neurofeedback makes our lives bigger. As our fear falls away with neurofeedback therapy, participating in healthy relationships becomes easier and communicating in a kinder, more open-hearted way takes less effort. We feel more skilled at connecting with others in a meaningful way. We can let go of anger more quickly and repair our relationships. With greater calm, the brain expends a lot less energy so it doesn’t tax us so much to be around people. We literally find it easier to articulate how we are feeling. And if you are a survivor of trauma or you suffer from anxiety, you may be used to needing a lot of recovery time after you have been social. As you become more resilient with neurofeedback therapy, the time you spend in isolation is likely to decrease because connecting with others feels less risky and more pleasurable.